How to be assertive

Assertiveness is being self-assured and confident without being aggressive or passive. It’s important to be both a self-advocate and to be assertive.

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Monique Ziegelaar profile picture
Monique Ziegelaar
Speech Pathologist & How I Learn Contributor
Happy smiling girl talking with her Goalball teammates

Assertiveness is being self-assured and confident without being aggressive or passive. Being assertive means getting your point of view across in a respectful way.

Passive communication: “I guess you can keep doing that even though I don’t like it.”

Assertive communication: “Please stop doing that, I don’t like it.”

Aggressive communication: “If you don’t stop doing that I’m going to hurt you.”

Assertiveness and advocacy are similar; they’re both about standing up for yourself. The difference is advocacy is about your actions, whereas assertiveness is about your communication style.

It’s important to be both a self-advocate and to be assertive.

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